She isn’t Down Syndrome, and Down syndrome isn’t her.
— Madisen Clark

I truly believe god gave us Londynn! Many times when I found myself crying in the hospital I stumbled upon this book that my Grandma kindly brought to us the day after we found out about the beautiful blessing we had received. I found myself reading this book daily. It brought so much comfort to me to know Heavenly Father trusted me with one of his special angles.

I want you to know we cried and we cried a lot yet we weren't crying  because we were disappointed in the diagnose we cried because of the many fears that followed the diagnosis.

As I mentioned before I didn't know Londynn's diagnosis before hand so when I found out I wasn't aware of all the complications that could come along with T21 ( Down Syndrome). As I started doing my research and educating myself about the diagnosis my fears grew. Kids with this diagnosis could have anything from low muscle tone to open heart surgery. As my fears just kept growing I realized the internet wasn't the best idea yet any doctor will tell you that.

Instead I started educating myself as I went. This was the best decision I could have made! I stopped worrying about the things that Londynn wasn't dealing with at the time and started focusing on the problems at hand. She had small holes in heart yet from what they could see they believed they were going to close on their own over time which they did WAHOO! Her muscle tone wasn't low she was as strong as you could possibly be at 4 pounds 7 ounces! Londynn didn't fit the jar that the doctors had tried to put her in along with many other children with special needs . I'm not discounting the opinion of any particular doctor.  I believe a lot of these children are never given the chance to exceed the limited expectations placed upon them yet given the opportunity these children may far exceed our expectations.

 I didn't spend 9 months learning about how she was supposed to be or how things should be. While some people choose to do genetic testing Logan and I chose not to.  I do not believe genetic testing is a negative thing it's just not something we felt was for us.  At this time we do not believe genetic testing will be in our future with other pregnancies if we are so blessed to have more children.

 By choosing not to do genetic testing  I got 9 months of enjoying the miracle of life growing inside of me, growing to love the beautiful baby we would soon introduce to the world.  I spent 9 months preparing for Londynn! She is a beautiful happy baby. Londynn has Down Syndrome yet she isn't Down Syndrome and Down Syndrome isn't her.   

I love reading to Londynn and I know she loves listening! I read that special book I mentioned my grandma brought to us,  GOD GAVE US YOU more nights than not. It's such a special reminder to Logan and I how blessed we truly are Londynn chose us to be her Earthly parents.

Copyright © 2017 by Madisen Clark

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed “Attention: Permissions Coordinator." Madisen Clark (livingwithalittleextra)